You are a spirit being housed in this body.
This body you live inside is a sacred vessel. And it is time to honor it as that.
When we shame our bodies, we limit what we are able to create with our highest self. Let us reclaim our power of creation, manifestation, of LOVE by honoring our bodies.
On honoring the wrapper encasing the soul. Listen here or read the post below.
🎧 Listen to Episode 69: Body Love, Healing Art, #aseatatthetable
My loosely edited session notes, including timestamps, plus all links, quotes, books, and movies mentioned below
Click here to jump to the show references mentioned in this episode.
This episode is also available wherever you enjoy podcasts or downloadable here:
http://robinhallett.libsyn.com/episode-69-body-love-healing-art-aseatatthetable
My notes from this show:
0:00
On today’s episode, body love. You are more than a number you’re more than a size. You are a spirit being in this body, and it is time to recall and reclaim the power of self-love and healing through honoring the body.
Let’s learn to honor the wrapper on your beautiful sparkling self.
The inspiration this week is some fun body art, and we’ll have a letter from hashtag, a seat at the table. All this and more come grab a cup of yum yum and meet me here.
Well hello there gorgeous friend, it is me Robin, your heart sparkler and friend on the journey. Welcome back to the podcast episode 69. Hi. If you’re new here. Hello, it’s me. We are going to have a good time. And thank you to whoever mentioned this podcast you. Please say thanks from me.
How are you today my friend? How is the weather in your heart? Are you being good to you? Have you been riding the waves well staying true to you being sweet to you. I hope so. You are a precious gem. You matter the most.
Over here is, boy, I wish you could see out the window, it is sunset. I have a couple of hours before my next session, I went for a nice walk singing at the park, I sometimes like to do that, walking home the most magnificent sunset. It is so spectacular, those bright, vibrant reds and oranges. I haven’t talked to you since Thanksgiving so we had a lovely time really enjoyed ourselves took lots of walks in the woods, so wonderful and lots of talks, number one, husband and I are like, where people get sick of each other because like we’re together morning noon and night sometimes in a conversation that is so awesome, and ongoing about the journey, about life. We had a really good time, watched a bunch of movies cooked for us, made two times Robbie’s famous leftover turkey sammys, which is pretty much everything but the kitchen sink between two pieces of sourdough toast, as my mother used to say, calorie bomb baby. But who cares. Special treats for special times, I say! So I would stack the Sammy high toast the sourdough, do you want to know how I do it. You toast the sourdough toast. And you put some butter on there. And then you just go to town, what is left over from your meal, your amazing meal. And you need to think about the soggy factor. So put the things that are least likely to suck it up on the outside. First, on the toast. And then just keep going. It is so much fun. I use a fork and knife for most everything, but for the sammys is so much fun and so messy I tie a bit on. And I use both hands and just eat the sandwich, without any silverware. I’m easy to please but it doesn’t take much to make me happy I guess that was nice and just lots of walks, and Yahtzee and time by the fire but you know also plenty of alone time too.
I don’t know about you, but I crave a lot of time on my own and it feels very necessary I was talking about this a little last episode. Guilty pressure, the feeling of heaviness with anxiety whatever comes around this time of year. That’s just residual in the body from growing up from lifetimes. This is the time of year for me where I especially need to be kind of gentle with myself and have plenty of time on my own just for me. No apologies necessary, you know no excuses no apologies, gotta do it every day. So here’s the big question of the day.
Are you guessing you guessing what’s coming next? Did you bring a cuppa yum yum?
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I have my most beloved rose Tulsi rose tea in a nice warm mug, and it’s so good. I love it, little sea salt, nothing else. And wherever you are right now, listening to this, I’m going to tell you something, you’re amazing. I raise my cup of tea to you, here’s to showing up on this journey with your heart open doing your best. Sharing light in the world as you go. I thank you for that. And here is to us, and this fabulous journey. Cheers. Oh so good. And I would like to say special cheers to my super awesome furry friend Cooper, Cooper Are you listening? Who’s a good doggy? And give a big hug and a kiss to your mama, Jen. This is for both of you. I’m raising my glass to the two of you want to say. You make my heart so happy, cheers.
So today.
What I want to talk about his body love loving your body appreciating your body, accepting your body. It’s a big deal.
I talked to a number of you throughout the week, sometimes we just mess it on Instagram, you, you like to follow my stories where I’m cooking and sharing things and here and there, somebody will ask me about diet. And what do we eat and what should we be eating and stuff like that so this is the perfect time of year to talk about body love because already. I’m recording on the fourth of December, I have seen more calorie-conscious ads going by that are talking about getting through this holiday period in a healthy way. And while I love that. I like to eat healthily. I’m also mindful of the focus on the subtle reminder that somehow. We’re not okay. What we want to eat is not okay, we should be worried about being healthy, we should care about losing weight. You know what I’m saying. It’s kind of hard to put words to it perfectly. Whether you consider yourself healthy, or you don’t want to put on any weight, you know, you don’t want to gain more weight or you call yourself fat or you think you’re too skinny. I’m sure all of us can relate to this feeling like I want to be okay. We all have this on some level, wanting to be okay.
So, yeah, today, body love. Let’s, let’s dive in. And I should say a disclaimer, I’m probably going to use language that just feels really natural and easy for me. And I’m. If you’re here, I know you know how much I care about you in this journey, and if I say a word like fat or skinny, or belly, you know whatever the words are if they feel triggered for you. Please know that from my heart. It comes with love and I have been thinking about how to do it, how to say it how to share and decided I don’t want to let my fear of being upsetting override the love in my heart for this message you know. So, when I was growing up, my family was very focused on losing weight. Being in shape to lose weight, not being in shape to be fit and healthy but being in shape means you would lose weight, there was this constant focus. I remember it very strongly on diet.
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I grew up having sweet-n-low on everything. And I remember my favorite and always eating fat-free saying, yeah but it’s fat-free! The focus was on weight and losing weight, which is a very limiting story. I know a lot of you will relate to this. I remember my mom talking about, we’re going to fat city, she would look at certain things and call them calorie bombs, you just knew you didn’t want to be that. That was bad, but actually I just grew up thinking that way I never really asked myself why, or if that was true for me, you know. So, instead of this assumption that the only thing that matters is if we can squeeze into our pants for that holiday party and stay out of fat city.
How about we practice celebrating and loving our bodies and honoring our bodies and appreciating our bodies, remembering we are spirit beings inside this body, so full of miracles and possibilities.
The focus on how much weight we’ve gained how much we need to lose how much calories we eat is so limiting. It does not honor who you truly are.
If you can relate, then the miracle I’m offering you today, the shift in perception I’m offering to you today is to decide that going forward, you are going to be kind and gentle to your body. You’re going to be accepting and loving your body. Appreciate your body. And part of that is part of the appreciation is learning to be kind to your body to honor your body in a way of giving it sustenance and nutrients, it is asking for. And not creating suffering for it with certain patterns of eating that make it hard for your body.
I know all about eating issues. I was telling you before that I came up in a very body-conscious weight-conscious household. I always had a, what I call a Buddha belly, I always had a belly, even when I was like four or five, I see pictures of me then and my belly. It’s so cute. I have done a lot of work to reclaim my right to love that belly. My body. Thank you belly.
Thank you belly. What could you say right now to do this practice with me, is it thank you booty? Thank you, arms! Thank you, thighs! No more calling them thunder thighs.
Let us love what we’ve got. Appreciate it, like the most amazing gift.
There have been many many decades where I tried to starve that belly, make it go away, make it disappear because it wasn’t acceptable. I’d be calling myself fat, fat pig. Holding it, touching it. And being disgusted by it, you know. One day I realized that is such an unkindness to such a magnificent body, you know that’s housing me! And my spirit my soul my life. To call it fat pig, to look at it in disgust to carry shame about my body, so not good. So unkind. So dishonoring.
I just really wanted to be done and decided I was done. And from that day forward that’s when I really began to feel like a goddess.
Beautiful goddess.
No matter what I looked like.
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No matter what I was wearing no matter what my weight was a gorgeous goddess. There were no impediments to the light trying to come through. No, I wasn’t saying it’s disgusting You’re disgusting. I really wanted to get to know what it felt like to be easy in my body. So I began to work with it, work on it and work with it. We want to feel like we like and accept ourselves, and we’re proud of who we are. We’re proud of what we look like. We feel comfortable in our skin and we also feel when we go out in the world, we feel okay about how we are when other people look at us. I really really get this. I do what I know what comes to me through spirit or comes to me when I sit with people what comes to me when I ask when I talked to God, is that our work is to liberate the light within and to not dial ourselves down to just the level of form, you know, just the body to appreciate the housing. The body is the housing for your spirit for you for your essence to appreciate that. To stop throwing rocks at it with your mind to start lovingly taking care of you. And I know you do, do this, to an extent already. I know you know this already, and it bears repeating that we are more than just this body.
We are not only a body. And when we identify as a body, we suffer. Because the lens is dialed way down that the only sense of, for lack of a better way of saying it value our worth is what we look like. And we are more than that so much more.
The Course in Miracles says I am not a body. I am free. I am as God created me. You can only be shining sparkling beautiful light-filled. Love is who you are not a number. Size, not on were they not less than, not an acceptable. Not a fat pig, not disgusting, as I used to refer to my own body. And it’s healthy and right to want to take care of your body to feel good in your body. It’s good to be honoring of your body. Because why it is the housing for your soul, and it is A Course in Miracles calls the body, a communication device. It’s the way we share light in the world through the body, so it’s okay to want to take care of your body it’s okay to want to feel good about how you look, all of that it’s, it’s just please don’t think that’s all you are making any sense today I hope so. I really, really do I get it, I have been on all kinds of sides of weight stories weight gain weight loss super skinny super uncomfortable super comfortable and the best is when I love myself as is, or as I sometimes tell you, Aziz, my favorite department that IKEA “As Is”, it’s the easiest way to live. Yeah, you got to deal with your ego stories about what you look like, but you are a shining, beautiful light. I love There’s a song by Annie Lennox, it says you are a shining light. We should put that on together today and have a dance party. You’re shining light. And,
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like I keep saying I get it, I get it you know I was talking to number one this morning I was telling him I want to do this episode on body love and he said, Brad Pitt was on the cover of, I don’t know, Esquire or something and we were talking and he said for guys to this thing about wanting to be attractive. The desire to be beautiful is it’s really in the DNA you know think about survival and mating and all that so we can ever respect for why it’s important. At the same time, practicing loving ourselves as is, because we’re shining lights. Wow. I love that. And, you know, again I get it when people tell me you look good. What have you been doing that’s it’s nice to hear that. But what if they’re what they’re really seeing is the light in you. That’s liberated because you’re not so dang dang focused on how many rolls are in the middle or if your thighs are rubbing together or your double chin is waggling. You know, what if it’s because there’s a light in you, even if you think today Robin is off her rocker. Of course, I need to lose weight, of course, you know, even if that’s true, even if you do, it’s still an amazing practice to focus on the whole of you than just the few bits that you cannot accept. If you want to lose weight. That’s the only way it’s going to happen, you have to be that energy and essence of ease and flow in the body or it will never happen. you know you’ll just be in resistance and resistance attracts more resistance objections to the body attracts more objectionable energies, you know what I’m saying. So this is good, even for us skeptics out there, even for people who don’t care about being the light we really really do just want to look good. It’s really hard to lose weight from a place of needing to look a certain way to fit a certain story to be a certain thing. It’s difficult. If the premise is, I’m not acceptable as is not beautiful as I am I’m unacceptable in this form. That’s what we’re going to stay is unacceptable. If there’s weight to release, or there’s weight to gain or whatever the issue is their joint issues, there are so many things the body, speaks to us throughout the day asking for things. It begins with love and kindness. It begins with a decision to accept and appreciate how you are right now. And that’s a day in day out practice. I look in the mirror sometimes getting out of the shower or just walking around, and that story will come back fat pig that term will come back to me fat pig, just for a moment. It’s just the old programming. So if you have that too. don’t be so quick to latch on to the first thing. It’s just old programming old junk in the trunk. I’m cracking myself up, let’s call that the junk in the trunk Okay, that’s the old stuff. The old trunk in the trunk. Your body is not the problem. It’s the old carp. We’ve been carrying around that other people helped get going for us growing up. Right. My poor parents, sometimes I think they’re up there wherever they are flying around the universe, they’re like There she goes. She’s about to harp on us again. So, yes. Thanks, Mom and Dad. Like I said, I grew up in a very body-conscious family and lots of commentary. I’ve been thinking about this a bit today about the exterior of my body, what it looks like. And just simply put, I wanted to be loved by my parents, I wanted to be accepted in my family so I cared very much about what they thought about what I looked like. And, you know, they sucked at it, their job of affirming my, my life and my beauty, obviously, today is much better. There’s so much more awareness around that. Growing up, we were not so clear. So, there were lots of things said to me, and I’m curious that that happened to you, too, can you relate to this. I still remember wishing to be them wishing to be
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more beautiful. You get it. You have your stories I am sure. Today, it’s our great honor and joy to be the good enough Mamas and Papas to our own heart, to share that love, and that sparkle and that encouragement in a healthy way for us and all we’re doing and capable of doing, you know. So we really owe it to ourselves to not do the same assessing that was done to us as children. Be a good parent to you, encouraging and loving. And if there are issues that truly really do truly call to you to be worked on. This is how you’re going to get that done. This is how you’ll do it. You know healing in any form you want to do healing cannot happen in a hostile environment, and if we’re judging ourselves. It won’t really happen. So when we’re in that judgy place. When we’re not loving and accepting more of our energy is in the mode of shame and unkindness towards ourselves. And it’s like more of us is aligned with the icky feelings about who we are, and it’s the weirdest thing, but when we’re aligned with our icky feelings about who we are. We make icky choices about how to take care of our bodies. You’ll think about this and see if you can connect some dots for yourself. I made some notes here about me. Because I really, I really do have a lot of experience, I really have logged a lot of miles on this topic. And when you believe you’re an ugly fat pig, you go by ugly fat pig things and support that. It’s an unconscious thing but you end up buying things that not even just food but clothes that don’t make you look good. It’s an uncut very unconscious thing, but it’s harder and harder to choose things that really feel flattering or fun, or it’s just you love wearing it you feel good in it so you’re more aligned to even wearing things that don’t feel good. We end up craving food that is really not going to help us to feel alive and vibrant and have a healthy glow to us. It’s a whole system that comes with it a whole system of chaos that goes with that. And we’re more aligned with choices that kind of support, the icky consciousness, for lack of a better term that it becomes wiseness. It’s such an interesting thing and again I say you know study yourself and see how this might fit for you. It’s so good to talk about this in a light-hearted way. It’s us here. I think we can all relate to what I’m talking about, and it can feel embarrassing, or shameful. I really, that’s my deep, knowing, is that the more we can open up and not keep it a secret, the better. We’re going to feel so this is all being offered with so much love. Okay. When we’re not really vibrating with our goddess he God what is the guy version of a goddess I’m sorry you awesome dudes. It feels weird to say God’s you Gods out there. When we’re not vibrating with that knowing, with that truth on we’re not really working to align with, I am amazed balls I’m beautiful. I’m healthy, and my wish is to be healthy. Then we’re more in this energetic system of what some of us call sabotage or like I’m just saying the icky consciousness. There’s so much more suffering that happens so I want to talk about self-soothing a little bit self-soothing with food. It’s a big thing,
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and something I have a lot of history with as well. I grew up self-soothing with food, some of my earliest memories were getting up early and climbing up on the counter and getting out the ice cream out of the freezer and eating several bowls of ice cream before anybody woke up, or I would pour really big bowls of cereal. The sugary cereal and extra sugar on top, and nobody was really there to watch me or see what was going on, and I rarely got called out for any of that, I just ate to comfort myself. And so, you bet your bippy that when I feel stressed and pressed. I still feel that call to get something to eat. Such a moment of freedom came to me when I realized that that feeling may never go away. But I can answer the call differently today. Did I run that run but it, but that craving may never go away but we can answer the call differently today. And you don’t have to do it by counting points or freaking yourself out or weighing yourself every single day. You know you don’t have to do it that way. You can talk to your body and ask it what it wants. I wanted to tell you this today because sometimes you guys will write to me and say wow, I wish I could cook like you or make the meals that you’re making. And it’s like, it’s just intuitive eating just listening along, and there are plenty of times where I’m having pizza and enjoying that to that thing is that I’m listening, not perfectly, but I am listening. And I want to be kind and gentle and loving with my body. So something super sweet you could super kind you could do is just to start saying, How am I doing, what do I need. How am I doing, and what do I need. How am I feeling what would I like to eat, what would I like to have today. Self-soothing goes, two ways, doesn’t it, loving, kind, gentle and generous consciousness when we bring that energy to the one and also once. I don’t know, you know, a million donuts, to sort of block the day away. And I’ll tell you about me in a second. Right there, you could catch that impulse and say, I remember Ross from friends home. What’s happening. What’s going on, you know none of us is a failure or should be ashamed. I know we are, and I hope that me talking to you like this today’s going to help. So much to liberate our light. We learned how to try and help ourselves out of a very stressful time with eating or drinking or smoking or whatever it is for you. You know, it’s okay. So there’s no perfect version that exists, where, you know, you only eat grass and breathe air and drink water and you never watch TV anymore and you never swearing you never drink and you never smoke, you know what I mean. That is the unhealthy most unhealthy thing is that story we tell that there is a perfect version we must achieve, we’re perfect now. And the problem is the whole reason we’re suffering is we don’t get it. We don’t see it. Is this making sense. Yeah, so self-soothing can go in another direction now, I sometimes get that impulse to eat. When I’m not hungry. And I say let’s go for a walk. Let’s make some art, let’s make a nice cup of tea I also think there’s something. The body is asking for. I know for me sometimes when I’m craving like honey and butter on toast it’s really because I need a nap. And my body is like Hi, this will put her to sleep. Quickly.
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The body has wisdom. But it’s probably not that wisdom if you are on your 12th donut. I used to lock myself in the bathroom with a bunch of donuts and eat them. If that’s you, too. That’s how you manage stress. This may be surprising to you. What I learned from my own binge eating behavior is, that is one of the best guidance systems, I know of is a craving to lock yourself in the bathroom and eat donuts, or have a little day drink to get through the day, those kinds of things I know a lot of us can carry shame about it and we don’t want to talk about it. But here’s what I think you If that’s you, you have an amazing guidance system right there. And if you could simply practice not shaming yourself or rejecting yourself, not being disgusted by your cravings. We could be on to the next page of your journey. It’s that simple. It’s that true. Wow. You’re really craving donut. Today, good. What’s going on, and just that pause just that gentle tender pies will tell you so many things if you want to listen. What’s going on. Well, I’m stressed and pressed, I’m scared. I’m worried. There’s so much to do. Or you ask what’s going on, and you realize I haven’t had any time for me I haven’t made any meantime. And so, the pleasure center of your brains like, I, I will take the pleasure however I can get it and if all I’m going to get is 15 minutes in the bathroom with those donuts. Let’s go. It’s trying to reach for an experience that will bring some pleasure. But the thing is, you know, afterward. I never felt good. Maybe you never felt good either doing those kinds of things. But let’s not judge it. Let’s not shame ourselves let’s not beat up on ourselves. We are sacred beings. Individual sparks of the Divine created in the image of the creative cosmos. Let’s not beat up on ourselves, let’s not be unkind let’s please not call ourselves fat pigs, or disgusting, or ridiculous. You know, know whether you consider yourself overweight or fat or too skinny, or underweight or whatever the story is there and you know I hope you know my language is coming from love. And I am offering this in the highest and best for all of us. And I hope that my language is not feeling hard to hear this one to say that I don’t think there’s any of us who don’t know this fear of not being okay, of not being enough of the anxiety. We can get through this by a fear slum and deep acceptance of who we are and that is a practice that we can do forever. Every day. Every day, and release ourselves from the expectation that we need to get to a certain weight, a certain size. We can release that story, gentle and kind. Because that’s really the answer. That really is the recipe we’re all craving to honor the body and the soul to appreciate it. And then we gravitate towards naturally towards the food with the healthy life force. The food with the life force with the minerals and nutrients. Our body is asking for. I have cravings like that all the time for green beans and cherries and salmon. And that’s what I’ll make you know it’s so simple, but then when they ask for an Ezekiel toast and butter and jelly, or Honey, I’m not gonna say, No way, fat pig, you better not eat that or you’re going to be. I’m just so fascinated by my body and what it needs. We’re not going to eat eight slices of that, I’m going to enjoy those two slices because that could be my tendency.
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And the two sizes and call it good. And I’m going to remember the food that makes me feel not so great, and I have told you this before but certain highly processed things and syrupy things, whatever that syrup corn syrup is or whatever I do, I will feel extra depressed, extra down I can feel a deep deep dive in my mood. The next day, and I’ve come to know that so well that I really want to honor that and not do that to myself, which I think it’s such a kindness is so important to check in with your own to learn to check in with your own inner knowing about what to eat and how to eat and how to move your body what it needs, and what its needs are and you really want to be on your own side. You want to be your own friend with this, you want to be kind and gentle want to be your friend. For those of you who are wondering how to do better with your body in whatever way Your goal is first to get on the page with loving your body, you are more than a number. You are more than a size. You are more than the fat cells in your belly, or your boobs, or your body, or your thighs or all of the above, and your arms, men, and women you know we are amazing and, and beautiful and this body is a miracle. It’s a miracle. And to make a conscious choice to decide today, and to ask you to consider this to say thank you to your body. It’s going to change everything. And it’s the right step for you on the healing journey. Thank you body. I love your body. It’s for cleansing my liver body. Thanks for making me all those new red blood cells, body. Thanks for keeping me juicy in my joints body. You know, it’s not just all about belly fat or fat fat or whatever. Thank you body, I love you body. Thanks for holding my guts and body. Yeah, thank you. Wow. So you know how it was saying your body’s not like any other body out there. What I’m really saying is, it’s okay if you don’t look like everybody else. Maybe you like me wished, at some point, you could be what the more socially acceptable body looked like. And I’m doing tons of air quotes there. I fully acknowledge that it is an unsupportive thing. I’m not saying I support that at all, but I am acknowledging that I can remember getting magazines and wishing I looked like that, there’s maybe a tug… some kind of tug in your heart about that, some kind of tug about that in my heart. It’s okay to acknowledge because Hi, we are us. And you know what else we are changing the perception in the world, part of a movement that is honoring real bodies, and that is like the most powerful light sparkler journey there is, we are changing that energy by loving and accepting our bodies, the way they are appreciating adoring thanking our bodies. There’s so much in the body image movement happening now. And you and I are part of that. Isn’t that the coolest deciding that we are going to be loving our bodies accepting our bodies when we catch ourselves judging our bodies reframing then again choosing again to love our bodies. Thank you body, love your body. That’s us helping the world, to feel as well. I am I’ve decided to continually and consistently model self-love self-acceptance, self-appreciation. And like I say, this is the body of a goddess, no apologies, period, love and acceptance for the when appreciating the beauty shining from within, in all shapes, sizes, ages, colors, always. That is the way forward. We’re gonna accept and love and express gratitude. And just as a final thing you say you’re somebody who accepts loves appreciates honors all shapes, sizes, colors, ways. Don’t forget, you have to do it for yourself as well.
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Sometimes we are hypocrites in reverse. Right. You know to do this for somebody else. So do it for you. So, love, I hope you love this talk today, I really really hope that we can keep talking about this, I’d love to hear from you on what your thoughts are. If you see this post going by somewhere, leave a comment so I know. May that serve you! We’ve got some great inspiration coming up and a fantastic letter.
I’d love you to think of somebody you can share this episode with lots of you I know who are in different groups. I would love you to share this in one of those groups, be a light sparkler to somebody else. I thank you so much. This is such an important topic, isn’t it? So I thank you always for that and the review is super duper awesome five stars, because, how would we break this episode five stars. I appreciate a review on iTunes
And just a final announcement, there are three spots left in my upcoming one day Assisi, Italy retreat with me. Those of you who are interested in and excited about that. The second week in January, there are three spots left for one day with me, you and me and Assisi. We will make magic together. The information on that is right on the website.
Today’s Inspiration: Body Tracing Art
You may notice on the cover art here for this episode. there is a drawing, and that’s actually what I call a body tracing. I love to do these, I have done these for years, whether we were on retreat, or in Healing Sessions, or my online courses, we always managed to end up doing some body tracing. It’s an empowering thing to decide to trace a part of your body and make some art. This is powerful for those of you who want to heal. If you want to celebrate last week’s inspiration was something very similar to take a picture of yourself and draw on it or write, encouraging words. This would be the trace, take a piece of paper and trace a part of yourself. Remember when we were in kindergarten we traced our hands and turn them into turkeys. Well, you can trace your butt and turn it into something way better than the turkey or your family or your I like to do the torso. I like to use newsprint like newspaper and tape it up on the wall, a blank wall, and just take a pencil and trace with a pencil, your body lines, and then go over it with maybe a sharpie and see what wants to come from there is such an empowering beautiful and fun exercise and I never get tired of doing it. I have. I’m looking behind me I have my feet my hands, my arms I’ve done my head there’s a beautiful piece of art behind me. Wow. I love it, and you usually find out you’re a lot smaller than you thought, which is always such a healing experience because I think many of us feel like we’re too big, somehow right that’s just perfect so any supplies you have you got those Amazon boxes that come the bigger ones newspaper, and those larger pads of newsprint that blank ones from the art store right Sharpie crayons, see what wants to come. It is the coolest thing, sit on it, stand on it, anything you want. It’s so cool. That’s what this art is on the episode that art if you’re able to see that, or you can go to my website and see that or check it out on Instagram it’ll be there. So I hope you love that they’re really really fun.
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This week’s letter: #aseatatthetable
Dear Robin. I loved your recent podcast on moving forward and procrastination. Thank you for sharing your work. I swear every time I’m able to tune in something profound resonates with me. I hope you never stop rocking it like you mean it. You mentioned you were short on letters so I decided to finally send something in, and not put it off, lol. My question is about wounds around feeling excluded, my problems started back in childhood when I had an awful experience with a group of friends who literally kicked me out of the club for months. They ganged up sending non-friendship notes intentionally ignoring me, as well as telling me I couldn’t sit with them at lunch. No matter how much work. I have done healing, forgiving, and letting go. I find myself still being triggered, as an adult. When I am ignored or left out of things. For instance, recently I attended an event where I met some interesting people and followed up by sending three of them short friendly emails, not one minute, or the next week I took a workshop from a woman and followed up by sharing a tip. She had asked about sending exactly how to use software along with a helpful link. Again, no reply comes on the heels of a meetup. I was supposed to have with another businesswoman in my area. After putting my special needs pet in daycare and driving over 20 miles to meet at a coffee shop. She was a no show. The worst part is, she didn’t answer my texts. Totally ghosting me when these things happen. I tell myself, I’m overreacting. Because of my old childhood story. I remind myself that people are busy technology can be weird. I could just be in their spam folders or maybe they just don’t have any manners, I get it. Really I do I tell myself that I can’t walk around life keeping a scorecard. I try not to overthink it. I remind myself that I can be funny and kind without needing anything in return. I also consider the law of attraction. And then if I continue to focus on the problem, it will continue to happen. Then I worry that something inside of me might actually be attracting this carp. The bottom line is Robin, even though I know I’m worthy of being treated well, why does it still hurt so much. When this happens, I do have several healthy wonderful friendships that I am very grateful for. But this is a distinct pattern that really emerges. When I attempt to develop new ones or meet new people, is the universe testing me until I get it right, fine. All I want is a seat at the table.
Well, my friend. I really appreciate your ability to articulate the energy, it feels you have been riding in the situations and the gravity in your adult life, and also I can so relate to that little kiddo and you, we would have been great friends on the playground. You know, it’s tough. We go through these horrible cruelties growing up, don’t we? It sucks. I just, there are still days where honestly I’m glad I don’t have to be in school anymore. But then you realize, oh, we’re still in school, aren’t we? We’re in earth school, and we’re dealing with these things that feel just as excruciating as it did when we were kids. So, here you are, you recognize this energy. It’s not about blaming yourself, or whether or not you’re jinxing yourself, or whether or not you’re driving more momentum to all of that might be true, because we do create healing experiences for ourselves, don’t we, but let’s not focus there because it won’t get to the root of the root, focusing there keeps us in the mode of
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focusing there. So, will be like oh my god Am I jinxing myself thinking about this. Am I being tested by the universe? Am I doing something wrong, that kind of stuff, just lead us in a circular argument with ourselves. I vote we drop completely out of that place, and come in to do the deeper healing, the deepest piece is there is a part of you that really really needs to be received wants and needs to be received. I see you as a small child in the trauma of that experience with the school beliefs, and there is still this residual energy that is asking to be healed. So, why does it hurt? You know, the experiences you’ve been describing that you’re going through today. tweak that place, the trauma lights up. and the healing is being asked to be done. So it’s tough when we’re opening the wound again and again. And we don’t really know what the message is really to do the wound care to clean and debris need clean it out and lovingly apply the South and the bandages and to hug ourselves tight and to do this work. So, today, it’s still hurty, because there’s not enough healing. I need to do more healing and I speak for all of us here we, we all can relate to this, I can relate to this, and some healing work lasts a lifetime. And I did not say a lifetime sentence 🙂 We’re continuously evolving into these amazing beings — our truest selves. We’re getting closer and closer to that with each liberation of this stuff, each time we step back and realize what’s really going on here. In my heart, what’s really going on here for you is the wounding is attracting you to people who are going to repeat the cycle on a much milder level. Of course a much milder level. Activate the trauma. Just enough, the prayer is, we get it. And we do the healing work. Does that make sense, see how this feels for you, of course, I use my Robin words and you’re going to have your own language so feel free to convert what I’m saying. Sitting with you now, it feels like the next move is to allow yourself to grieve. And I know you’ve done a ton of work. I really see that, I mean you wrote this in your letter but I can see you have done this work, and there’s always that last 10%. Damn it, you know, there’s always this piece, it’s like there’s still a bit more. It’s okay. You’re worth it. So there’s a grieving process. A letting go. And I can guide you through that right now. Which is to say. Allow yourself to know, really know how hard you’ve tried, how much you’ve done, how many times you’ve betrayed your own heart, for the love of another how you’ve put yourself out there on the line. And it was excruciating. For every time you are rejected. Not thanked no-showed ghosted for every time you felt like a worn-out used up taken for granted. For every resentment, every pain. Every heartache. You need to let this be grieved. And to a person. I would, I will say, everybody could be doing that a bit more. A lot of times we don’t want to focus there,
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we don’t want to, you know, we think it’s bringing on negativity. People will sometimes Tell me in session. If I let myself grieve. I may never stop, there’s this terror of going off the deep end to supply enough and you’ll never be okay again. But think about it. That’s really backward because you will be in this place you’re in forever. If you don’t do this work. You know the energy is supporting the one thing, staying hidden. I just want to move on and find new friends and you know make this work. And it’s going to be better. Well, it will be as soon as we empty out the sacred vessel which is you have the wound, the vibes we’re carrying now, which are contorting the energy, we’re building our momentum from for the future. And the best thing to come out of this grieving process, which truly I can’t say enough about great we need to grieve we need to cry. We need to create art around this we need to move this in our bodies, let it out in the name of clearing out and healing up, it’s different than being a victim. And then we’re ready to look at the patterns, as you were asking about the patterns. And now it’s good to really ask the question. Am I ready to be in a new relationship, and I know you’ve got your friends already but you’re, you know, wanting to connect with people in this is happening so am I really ready to be connecting with people who receive me in all the awesomesauce I am because there is some way. You’re pushing too much value and investment towards people who are bound to let you down. And I’m wondering if you even notice that intuitively in your belly somehow. If you really sense it. I’m getting better and better at this myself. It’s I laugh because it’s taken me so long but some of this stuff is deep, deep. You know, one of my patterns is the narcissistic stuff with my Dad. Oh God, he’s up there somewhere saying, There she goes again she’s gonna rail on me again. No, dad. Oh, I adore you. And that was the pattern. So I was being blown off and overlooked and by I bought him presents at Christmas he would inevitably throw several of them away without even noticing, all the work I put into stuff like he just couldn’t get me, and it hurt so bad. And so his pattern where I kept drawing and friends who didn’t get me and couldn’t see me and blew me off and even. I know you’re listening, they’re gonna laugh because sometimes they throw out my stuff too, or they say they never got it and it’s just that damn pattern again. It’s so funny. So we look at this stuff in ourselves and we say, are we really ready to be received? Are we really ready to give our hearts in the direction where they will be met? Because those peeps are out there, it takes our intuition and our knowing and yep, our wound healing and. Are we really ready to be held and received? And that’s scary. If you ask me, that’s big work, because what if it happens again. What if I get made fun of or teased or blown off again. Right. Whoo. Are you ready? And are you also ready to stop being in the cycle with people who can’t? Don’t won’t appreciate you. one of the most powerful things that will break that cycle is to realize you are the cool kid’s table. You know you ARE the cool kid’s table, a party of one. I think that’s also super healing for those of us who haven’t felt accepted, who’ve been hurting. For not feeling like we were in the in-club. Rejection goes so deep.
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The other piece I feel around you is to sit with your inner wise one seems to me like you’re a person who sits in quiet, and you can go deep So ask your inner shaman the inner healer. What’s the next piece for healing this because something is occurring to you about this that’s perhaps not quite having been listened to. Yet, you know, help yourself to stay out of the tennis match. Are they rude or are they busy are they jerks or are they just busy are they, they asked for help and then they didn’t appreciate it, you know, help yourself stay on the tennis match by saying, I am not interested in attracting more of the chaos and upset that I’ve already experienced, I’m ready for the next piece of this healing. It’s like chapter one of a book you keep you know we some part of our mind keeps rereading chapter one instead we’re we read it, we’re done we you know we’ve had our heart trampled Okay, okay, world, okay people? My heart’s been trampled already enough. No more heart trampled people. Thank you. So, better quality connections, that’s one for me I’m always working on that one, finding people who really can and are ready to meet me where I’m at. And that’s always a little scary. So there’s a bit of a trust walk there happening. And, you know, keep working on your worthiness. Your beauty your light your worthiness and be your own biggest fan you because you’re amazing. And that’s the truth. And yeah, don’t give your best cupcakes to people who really won’t receive them. So my friend. I hope this helps your heart, may this serve your heart, and always you know I’m here to do some of these deeper pieces together. It would be great if their calls you. So, yeah, we’ll leave it there, and friends, I hope this helps you too, those of you listening and nodding along, I really do. Well friends, If you’d like me to read your letter on the air. I’m here, you know, hello at Robin Hallett calm, or messaged me on Instagram. I’m also on the website you can use the form right there on the podcast page, and like our friends here you can have a made-up name. You can use an anonymous name, you can give yourself a name. Whatever makes you comfy. I so love to add a little light and healing into your world. And I thank you for being willing and courageous to send letters, and I do need more letters. Every if we do an episode every week, I need another letter every week at least so get going. Send a text, send a message, write a letter, you know, let’s go. If I can read your letter and shine a little light for you, or you have a follow-up topic for a future episode write to me here.
Well, friends, That wraps another beautiful episode of tea with Robin, and I’m super mindful that in about a week and a half I’m leaving for Assisi, Italy. I’m going to be there for a month. Wow, I mean I just still, it’s so amazing. I’m still really in that place of pinch me pinch me pinch me, and the other day number one said, you know, one of the best parts, is this relishing of the excitement, leading up to the trip. I wanted to tell you that because it’s a very interesting thing as you move closer to the holidays. Maybe you’re excited, instead of anxious, I just wanted to throw that out there to you, because there are moments where I think I’m having anxiety, but I’m really really just so excited for it. This is building up, it’s really great. I’m actually almost all the way packed I’ve been packing a little every day doing laundry, putting things together.
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So that’s it, I hope you love this episode. Body love, baby. Body Lovee and self-love, we are so awesome. And thank you always for sharing this on with somebody who could use it. So, this has been me Robin, and I’m going to see you here next time, or in a few minutes. If you like to binge listen to these episodes. Enjoy. and I’ll see you. Same bat time same bat channel. Bye-bye.
Tea with Robin Podcast Show References
A Course in Miracles Quotes:
The body as a communication device. — Chapter 8 – VII. The Body as a Means of Communication
I am not a body. I am free. I am as God created me. — Workbook Lesson 199
You might enjoy the Course in Miracles practices I offer here.
Related links for this episode:
On Loving Yourself Enough to Leave the Surface of Things
Rock It Like You Mean It: A Manifesto for Life
Want Your Happiness More Than Your Upset
Little Birdies Need Love Too: Understanding Why We Numb in Order to Cope
New Year’s Resolutions. Ugh. Here’s Some Love and Kindness With a Side of Whoop-A**
Robin’s Self-care Skincare Routine
Books mentioned in this episode:
A Course in Miracles: Combined Volume
You might enjoy the Course in Miracles practices I offer here.
Thank you for listening, may it serve you!
Hugs and love,
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Read my recent interview in Mystic Magazine here: https://www.mysticmag.com/psychic-reading/robinhallett-interview/